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Do I trust you, Lord?

Do I trust you, Lord? Do I even trust you?

I've been chewing over this question since the news that covid-19 had shut down basically everything. No going to the office, no weddings to shoot, no church to go to Sunday morning. Instead, chaos in the grocery store aisle, frustration trying to budget, confusion at every turn.

As many of you know, I am a planner. Every January, I look forward to picking out a fresh paper agenda (yes, I still use those!) to coincide with my calendar app. As the year goes by I ink-in my plans: coffee with Zoe, weekend in Utah, wedding dress shopping, work trip, date night, photoshoot, etc. I scribble in the adventures ahead and the packing list for each one. 

And then. 


I let my heart get excited. 

But what happens when your excitement turns into grief overnight?  

Many of my plans just got canceled. Many of your plans just got canceled.

Of course there’s the disappointment of cancelling a flight and scrambling to re-book half a dozen clients, but as the reality of our situation as a nation settles in, we start to realize that this is more than our favorite smoothie shop closing up or an extended spring break. To some, this is life or death. This is getting laid off and filing for unemployment. This is having surgery delayed. This is becoming a homeschool teacher on half of an income. This is having graduation canceled. This is losing a loved one, losing a business, losing your footing—all at once. 

And yet

this does not change who God is. 

He didn’t change when this virus flared up. He didn’t suddenly get surprised by the news one morning or decide to "shelter in place." Instead, Our Father, the triune God, Alpha and Omega, Jehova Rapha (our Healer), Yaweh, Lord of creation, remains faithful. He is steadfast. He is not leaving. Not now, and not ever.

Friends, the burden of our world right now is heavy. What a blessing it is that His yoke is light. I'm struggling to even fully believe it as I type, but I know in my soul, that His Word is true because He is true. He is true to His promises: to pour out grace (James 4:6), to redeem His children (Eph.1:7), to restore creation (Rev. 21:5), to bring His Kingdom. May our faith increase as we surrender our plans and cling to the promises of Christ in this time and hereafter.


And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.

/ 1 Peter 5:10 


In hope,  India Jade

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